


A Moment of Truth

by Arya_Durin_51



Category: TOLKIEN J. R. R. - Works & Related Fandoms, The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Anyways, Fëanor forgiving Indis, Gen, I Made Myself Cry, I Still Can't Tag For Shit, all the other characters besides the two first are only mentioned, fixing a familial relationship, i guess, i hope you cry, it's hard don't judge me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-03
Updated: 2019-01-03
Packaged: 2019-09-16 09:58:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16951878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arya_Durin_51/pseuds/Arya_Durin_51
Summary: Fëanáro has returned to life not too long before the Dagor Dagorath, and Indis shares a burden she has carried for a very long time.





	A Moment of Truth

**Author's Note:**

> When i came up with this particular story, everything was clear form the first moment. The tears came the second moment.

 

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

Fëanáro liked being alive. He always did, but this time was different. This time, he felt content to have actually earned the forgiveness of his darling sons - even Moryo - who refusd to meet him for years. But there were also reasons he did not like being alive, and one of them he met during a leisurely stroll in the palace gardens. It was Indis, and she was sitting on his ammë's favourite bench under the old willow tree. His parents had planted it when they had gotten engaged.

"What are you doing here?" He asked harshly as he moved to stand in front of her.

"Curufinwë," she said calmly and looked up. "Come, sit by me." She patted the bench right next to her, and smiled somewhat sadly. She smiled like that a lot of the time, especially when he was little. He didn't grace her with a verbal answer, but with a scowl. "Please, Fëanáro; there is something very important I must share with you." She sounded almost pleading - the proud Queen Mother would never allow herself to plead with anyone - so Fëanáro sat down begrudgingly. 

"Whatever it is you wish to say, say it quickly. And do not call me by my mother name ever again."

"As it pleases you." She looked him right in the eye, and steel met slate grey. "But I will not speak. I wish only to show you." She extended her hand towards him, palms up. He hesitated just for a second, and put his hands in hers, only to have her grip them tightly. All of a sudden, the world started spinning, and then it stopped. He found himself in a very private part of the mind of Indis.

_'It is time you knew. I can bear this alone no longer.'_

 

* * *

 

"Oh, Míriel!" Indis ran through the much different palace gardens towards her heavily pregnant friend. The willow was still there, and so was the bench, on which the Ñoldotári sat. She sat down on the bench, and she looked different from what Fëanáro knew her, yet the same. Her smile had not changed, but while her younger self walked barefoot in a light summer dress, her eyes reminded him not of Arafinwë, but of Maitimo.  _Eyes that had seen more death than anyone was allowed to see._

"Indis!" Míriel was more than happy to see her oldest friend and confidant. They had faced the horrors of the Hither Lands together since they were children, and so much were they like each other, that they fell in love with the same nér as well. Indis put her hands on her friend's belly.

"How fares your baby?" Said Indis excitedly. Her smile fell though, when she heard Míriel's next words.

"He is well... but tiring me greatly. My baby boy has a strong fëa. Intense, burning like _fire_. I am already thinking of names to match him," she said gravely. She moved her eyes from her belly to those of her friend's, and steel met slate grey. "I need to tell you something very important, and ask a favour of you."

"Anything." Míriel gripped Indis's hands in hers tightly.

"It's a very big favour... and you're not going to like it, no more than what I'm about to tell you."

"Míriel, whatever it is, I will do it. I owe you my life! Say what you want, and I shall see it done," Indis said loudly.

"First, I need you to promise me to keep it a secret. Especially from Finwë and our son. And if you can bear it no longer, and you have to share this burden, wait till the Dagorath."

"That's quite a long time... but I will do it. Just tell me what it is."

Míriel took a deep breath, seemingly gathering up her courage. "My son will be the reason I go to the Halls of Mandos."

"I don't think I understand." Indis was confused. "Míriel, what are you saying?"

"I am saying that I will die after I give birth. His fëa is consuming part of mine, slowly but surely. I won't last long after the delivery. A few years, maybe. A decade if I'm lucky."

"Stop talking like that! We're in Aman! You have the Vala of Healing at your disposal! This is not the East!"

"Indis, no one will be able to help me while I am still amongst the living."

"Stop this!" Indis freed her hands and stood up in rage. "You are not going to die! Those creatures didn't kill you, a baby cannot possibly be the death of you!"

"Be quiet! We don't need all of Tirion knowing about it!" Míriel grabbed her friend and pulled her down again.

"Whatever," the Vanya mumbled under her breath. She crossed her arms and turned away.

"Indis... can I still ask for that favour?"

"Yes," she sighed. She allowed herself to be turned towards her friend again.

"When I'm gone-"

" _If_."

"What?"

"If you die, not when."

"Alright. If all of this comes to pass, and my boys are left alone, I want you to help them. But not in the way you think."

"Be clear. What is it that I must do."

"I want you to marry Finwë."

"I'm sorry, what?" She raised an eyebrow.

"You heard me. You'll make him fall in love with you, and marry you."

"How did you come up with that? The laws the Valar set forbid anyone from marrying more than once!"

"Indis, Finwë always feels things intensely. You know that. His love is passionate. His love for you will become so great, that he will petion to the Valar to have his marriage with me annulled. I know you love him still.

"Please understand. I want Finwë to be happy. And with you, he will be. Give them the love and care I could not. Give Finwë the children he desires. Give my boy brothers and sisters to love and play with. I want my son to have a mother, to have a proper family. Please." Míriel, the most proud Indis had ever known, was actively begging.

Indis closed her eyes, tears rolling down her cheeks. "Alright. I promise you. I promise to marry Finwë and love your son as my own. I swe-"

"Don't! Do not take an oath. I have a feeling an Oath will bring Doom upon my descendants and yours."

 

* * *

 

Indis let go of his hands, and wiped her tears. She looked at him, expecting his fiery rage. For losing his mother, for being lied to. But he was simply crying, no sound escaping him. She cupped his cheeks and wiped his tears. 

"Now you look like your mother. You have her smile, also." He couldn't help but smile, and didn't pull away. "There it is. So bright, lights up the place. The night was not so dark when she smiled."

"I miss her. I barely remember her, but I miss her."

"Of course you do. So do I."

"She knew... before it all happened, she knew I would kill her." He bowed his head, but Indis would have none of it. She lifted his face again forcefully to look at him in the eye.

"Never say that again. It was the will of Eru, for good or evil. Don't you dare blame yourself."

"You mean you don't blame me? I took your friend away. The friend you loved so much you were willing to do all this for? You mean my father doesn't blame me? I took away his wife, and he loved her for so long."

"No, Fëanáro. We don't blame you. We never have, and we never will."

It was then that the child still residing in Fëanáro's heart finally let go of all pain and hatred. He fell into the arms of his mother, and wept.

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 


End file.
